My cat is demanding! What we can learn about stalking





My cat is demanding! What we can learn about stalking behaviors.

If you have cat, you'll recognize this behavior.  When the cat is hungry is will meow, nudge your legs and make a general nuisance of himself until you open that can. 

You try to ignore the cat....you pet the cat... you tell it you'll feed it in a few minutes but nothing works. 
The cat keeps trying...
After the 10th time of coming to you, you finally give in and feed the cat.
What has the cat learned ? 
It takes 10 encounters for you to give in. 
So the cat learns , the first 9 are going to be ignored and it's the 10th time is the sweet spot.

Stalkers learn the same way. If they leave 9 messages and they are ignored and you respond on the 10th one, what have they learned? It takes 10 times to get a response out of you. 

And it might not be just a text message. It might be 3 text messages, 3 notes on your car, 2 emails, 5 phone calls before you finally give in and say " Stop contacting me!" So they learn 13 contacts before response. 

Stalking experts state the absolute best response is silence. If you have terminated contact with the person, don't respond under any circumstances. If it is a case where limited contact must be made like child custody,  have a trusted third person be the go between. 

If  you feed the stalker, they will continue to come back for more....

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